Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
