i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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