Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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