Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Jerry, you need to find god
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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