Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
send nudes
from the living room?
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
