let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
