i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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