If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
