Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
