Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
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