They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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