I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
