I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
It's shark week go big or go home
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Randomize
