When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
