Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
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