she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
