I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize