I'm sorry my penis didn't work
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
