My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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