when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
