chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize
