wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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