I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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