would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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