Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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