We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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