We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
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