Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
