They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Randomize
