My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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