Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
