where am i from again
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Randomize
