went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
Randomize
