she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
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