I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
