And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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