theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
