I accidentally had phone sex last night
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
