Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
