Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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