Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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