i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
NoShamevember. You game?
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
