Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
