What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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