It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
