My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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