omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
This toilet bowl is my home.
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