I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
