i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Randomize
