Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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